Another bizarre month in cricket/showbiz
Where better to write this month’s column than the TMS box at Lords in the all singing all dancing media centre, writes BBC London’s Surrey summariser Johnny Barran. Like most cricket loving kids I aspired to play at the home of cricket, ideally leading England to a dramatic Ashes victory. However it was clear early on in my playing days that this was a fairly unlikely scenario, but growing up on a diet of Johnston and Arlott I did have aspirations to talk about the game I loved, with Lord’s being the Holy Grail.
So today those dreams are realized with the mouthwatering championship clash between Middlesex and Surrey who are second in the table. I say mouthwatering as Gordon Ramsey’s premier pastry chef Thierry who also works his magic at the Oval (he was baking a staggering 1000 cakes a day during the international T20 Tournament) is a guest in the commentary box and came armed with a ginger and carrot cake of distinction which as ever was demolished in barely a session by the BBC’s Kevin Hand.
It was a gorgeous day as I arrived at the ground. A few nerves jangled as I made my way up to the TMS commentary box where I was greeted by the news that Michael Vaughan had retired from all cricket. Earlier in the season I had the privilege of describing for the Beeb a silky 70 by Michael Vaughan for Yorkshire against Surrey in the friends provident. It was as ever with Vaughan a beautifully crafted innings with the trade mark cover drive, pull and pickup all in perfect order.
All of us on commentary that day hoped that it was a precursor to Vaughan’s re-admittance to the Test side, but as Steve Waugh pronounced there are no fairy tale endings in sport and careers inevitably end in tears as did Vaughan’s England career last year, very sad. It was quite appropriate therefore that the man responsible for finishing Vaughan’s career, Andre Nel joined us in the commentary box, Nel cleaned up Vaughan for a duck in the first innings and 17 in his final innings as an England player in the defeat at Edgbaston in the third test which sealed the series for South Africa. Nel, is charm personified off the pitch, but as he admitted on commentary he loves a scrap on the pitch.
Back to the cricket and Owis Shah treated us to a sumptuous 159 on day one, a poignant reminder to the selectors that he could excel in the longer form of the game. The highlight on day two was being allowed out on the outfield at the lunch break, which demonstrated to me emphatically what an incredible sporting theatre Lord’s is. Despite being supposed cricket correspondents and beyond churlish behavior Church, Hand and I spent the lunch break marking out our imaginary run ups, hitting imaginary sixes and taking imaginary wickets in our “virtual ashes” on the Lords Square much to the amusement of the written press who watched our antics in utter bewilderment.
Blimey. As I start my preparations for hosting this weekend’s polo international between England and Argentina I learn that my co-host for the event is Katie Price (aka Jordan) I am not sure whether to laugh or cry but it promises to be an interesting and entertaining day especially as the champagne starts flowing at 11.00am with prize giving a cool 7 hours later at 6. It could be a messy one……..
The later stages of both May and June have been taken up by the domestic 20/20 cup; it’s my favorite time of year as we squeeze in 10 games in a 14 day window. The week started with a visit to Hove in what was to become a must win game for Surrey. I arrived to mass media hysteria, as the World’s sporting press searching for Isdn lines and Wifi had descended on the sleepy sea side town. Not I might say for the 20/20 but for the Ashes as Australia formally began the Ashes tour with a 4 day game against Sussex. On arrival I made the fatal error of following Derek Pringle into the media catering, there were slim pickings in the great man’s wake so I settled for a burger.
As we took our seats for the must win contest, Churchy spots billowing smoke to our left hand side and remarks jokingly that it would be a disaster if that was the flood light generator! The lights at the sea end fail to fire and Churchy is spot on, nightmare! However as Sussex have previous in this territory (the lights failed against Kent) they had managed to rustle up a contingency generator and 40 minutes later had it running. Spare a thought for Afzal who was out first ball before the game was halted till the lights were up and running, sadly Surrey struggled and Sussex romped home.
With a finish way past 11.15, I catch a lift with Churchy and analyst Steve Rudkin in the “kit” van, once they have cut the highlights for Surrey TV and not before I packed it (had to earn my lift) the high point being packing the great man’s kit on board, memo to potential interested parties Ramp’s bats don’t travel in the Van, those including the one he scored his 100 100′s travel with him. We get back to the oval at 2.45 am nice!
Next up Surrey entertain Kent in another must win game, its a family show this evening as my brother in law is Surrey mascot Kenny Kennington. Kenny brings the house down in the build up to the game as he moonwalks, break dances and “caterpillars his way round the oval to Snoop Doggy Dog. Despite woven in ice packs in the costume, Chris. Loses 3 pounds in body weight and remarks that it’s the best work out he has ever had ever had. I am also on my best behavior as I have Seb Coe as a guest, despite my “gentle pressure” on trying to get the 20/12 Olympics to include cricket he refused to commit, I will keep trying though. Sadly Surrey lose in a thriller by 1 run and with it ending my lingering hopes of a trip to Finals Day.
The 6th Ashes test being hosted by my village side East Bergholt on the 28th of August is picking up momentum as I have managed to persuade Stuart Law to captain Australia. Neil Foster, Derek Randall, John Lever and Devon Malcolm are already confirmed for England, it promises to be a cracker!
